I see all of you posting on here about your readiness to take the steps needed to lose weight for whatever reasons you may have. Some of you are nervous, some of you are excited, and I am just THRILLED to be here with all of you! I too am starting my program on Tuesday- I am at the end of my rope as well as many of you others. I would like to extend my hand of friendship and encourage ALL of you that if we work this thing TOGETHER and support one another, then perhaps we can make it. I believe in the power of many. I look forward to meeting all of you and sharing in your successes!!!

 Hi Danidani with the bodatious fanny :0)  I'm new to the program also and I totally agree with you!  It's been so nice to talk with some of the other ladies about stuff.  I also visit the 25-50 room.  One thing I have learned is that everyone is so great about offering help when I have a question.  Good luck...see you around :0)

Ela

 Shaelynn I feel exactly the same way. But I way quite a bit more than you. I let society bring me down too. One minute I can look at myself in the mirror and half way like what I see and feel pretty about myself for the day and then I go to town and see women that might be blown away by a gust of wind and start picking out my flaws, feeling horrible. I have had so many blood tests done and everything says I am healthy, I'm just fat. I dont think its right that because we may be a little over weight we are unhealthy and people look at us differently.

Honestly, I think your weight is the perfect weight. I wouldnt want to be to skinny. I weighted 180 lbs in 2004 and I was so happy and felt very good about myself. My goal is to get back to that. Just wanted to let you know you are not alone.

Thank you Rhiannon.  I appreciate the back-up.  It's just so frustrating and I don't think society is ever going to change their minds on this topic.  Just think about how many of those "skinny" or as I see it many times, underweight gals are really UNHEALTHY!  No one seems to notice that until they're about on their death bed.  The tabloids really upset me because they dog the stars when they're a perfect weight, over weight, under weight....it doesn't matter.  Our poor girls of today must be so confused as to what real beauty is!  I tell my daughter she is pretty all of the time.  I make it a priority to tell her different things I like about her appearance daily!  It's important to instill that confidence while they are young so they don't care what society says because they know they are beautiful.

I grew up with a father that did and still does make fun of my weight.  Even when I was at my best weight ever after my divorce 10 years ago, he told me constantly to watch what I eat or I'll end up fat again.  I lost 80 lbs after my divorce and was 125 and kept it off for 6 years...but guess what?  I was at the gym ALL the time.  I was taking Xenadrine which contained the high amounts of ephedrine back then and so pretty much I wasn't eating and working out constantly.  I looked great but know that I was starving myself and didn't even realize it because the ephedra made me not feel like eating.  Ephedra gave me energy and I still have a hard time not using it pre-workout.  I don't take it for appetite control, but I don't need it for that.  I am not a heavy eater, but I do have days where I make the wrong choices for what I eat.  I would be happy at 140 lbs because that is at the higher end of my weight range for my height according to the BMI facts...but right now at 162 - I feel like it's gotten out of control again and I know I don't want to go back to feeling sluggish all of the time and also VERY irritable (because I hated myself therefore I made sure the world knew how angry I was) and the only way to control this weight increase that I know of is eating healthy, portion control and exercise.  The problem is that none of that is working this time around.  Once I hit 30, things changed.

My Dad now tells me that there obviously is something I am doing wrong and actually used the phrase "sitting around eating ho-ho's all day" which really hurt me.  I haven't ever even had a Ho Ho!!!  lol  I need to stop listening to him and stop paying attention to society's view of what is beautiful.  Most days I feel very pretty and sometimes, when I am tan, I even feel sexy.  That should be my guide, not what everyone else thinks.

For the record, I know I can only see your face Rhiannon, but you are really pretty!

 Thank you too Shaelynn. After reading what you wrote, I teared up a bit. When I read your first post I kept thinking, 'how could she possibly think that about herself?'. You are very pretty.  

I had a similar situation to yours with your dad. For me it was my two older brothers always telling me how fat I was at a young age and making fun of me with their friends. I can also remember back to middle school and my mom telling me to "suck it in" all the time. After high school when I lost a lot of weight and even then my mom was still rude to me, it always seemed like a competition with her. Because of all the teasing I got from family and peers I worry that when I am eating a bowl of ice cream or a candy bar my husband is thinking "gosh does she really need that?" or "how much more could she stuff in her mouth?". I know he doesnt think that because he assures me constantly that he loves me exactly the way I am. Some times I even ask him if I weighted 800 lbs and had bed sores would he still love me and he always says yes.

I know that the numbers of my weight are high, but I dont usually feel like my weight. I dont let it stop me from doing things. My husband does this Mixed Martial Arts training (like the UCE and UFC stuff) and there for awhile I was going with him and doing it. I really enjoyed it and it was an awesome work out. I didnt go for awhile and the other day I decided to start again. Well since it had been a couple months since I had done it, I was a bit breathless and had to stop and take breaks (which always makes me feel like a loser). But I figure hey at least I am trying.  There was only two other girls there, very pretty and very tiny. When we started working on wrestling moves one of the fighters came over and was showing us girls some moves. He completely ignored me. He even stepped right in front of me while I was watching a move and almost knocked me out of the way. I was invisible to him and it hurt. Because of this, and I know its wrong, I told my husband I was done with it. This one person ruined it for me because he treated me like nothing. Felt like I was in high school again.

The world is full of rude and inconsiderate people. And I agree with you about the young girls growing up in todays world. It has to be so hard for them. It was hard for me in high school and that was only 5 yeas ago, I dont think I could do it now.

I, like you, have had many unsuccessful diets and it gets so frustrating. Its nice that there is a place where we can all chat about our experiences, good or bad.

"There was only two other girls there, very pretty and very tiny. When we started working on wrestling moves one of the fighters came over and was showing us girls some moves. He completely ignored me. He even stepped right in front of me while I was watching a move and almost knocked me out of the way. I was invisible to him and it hurt. Because of this, and I know its wrong, I told my husband I was done with it. This one person ruined it for me because he treated me like nothing. "

THAT upsets me!  What a jerk!  I know I get treated that way too when I am out with the girls.  Most of my friends are smaller than me and I always get left out when the bar tender is flirting or when they get free drinks.  It's BS!  Granted, I don't need to be flirted with to feel good about myself, but when someone blatantly leaves you out of the mix, it's obvious what they are doing.  Being invisible sucks and I know exactly how you feel hon.  I am like you too when it comes to my fiance.  I ask him those same silly questions.  I even worry that if I complain about my weight too much, will he start to notice that maybe I am right and I will disgust him?  We are getting married on Sept 20th and I am depressed because I won't be thin for the wedding.  I was working full time and going to school full time for the last 3-years which attributed to the slow weight gain and I just earned my BS degree in Marketing & Business.  Although I am proud of myself, I had to make sacrifices and the gym was one of them.  Now with only a month left until the wedding, there is no way I'll lose enough weight to look how I imagined myself. If only he and I had met about 6 years earlier - I would have looked perfect on my wedding day.

Pictures are super important to me and I feel like they are going to suck because I am heavy.  We are spending $3000 on pictures (the most of any cost aside from the reception) and I really wanted to look perfect.  I guess there really is no such thing as perfect is there?  I just hope my fiance thinks I look beautiful that day.  :o)

 Shaelynn you are going to look so beautiful for you wedding do not even stress about it. Just dont forget to put on deoderant like I did! I am sure that if you walked down the aisle in pajamas he would be just as excited to marry you. Your day will be perfect, even if there are some things that go wrong, you are marrying the man you love and nothing can ruin that!

I get the same thing at the bars and its rediculous. I dont want them to flirt with me, but if they do it kinda bumps up my confidence. And it can ruin a good time if you get shoved aside for some ultra thin (not so pretty) girl.

Mary, thank you for what you said. The dumbass does know exactly who my hubby is. Two nights before we were at the bar with him and he talked to me no problem. He's just one of those guys that thinks with the wrong head! LOL!

I love that we can get on here and discuss whatever we want! Its such a big help.

 I don't see Mary's post - where did it go?

Thats weird, Marys post just dissapeared or something.

 Hi Ladies,

Yes, I got one of those "Your Post Has Been Deleted" emails saying I used offensive language.  Offensive?  Shees, I don't recall saying anything offensive!

Mary

 Here is a hand extended back. I just started the program and like you, I, too, am looking for the support to help me achieve my goals. I can sense your energy and have no doubt you have the ability to make your goal a reality! I welcome your support and energy!

You gals are great! Don't forget that ;-)

Mary - you got a post deleted?  That is so strange... LOL ;-p

jdemo78:

Mary - you got a post deleted?  That is so strange... LOL ;-p

 Hi JD,

Yep ... beginning to think the moderator here doesn't like me too much.  Shae and Nannon both read it.  Apparently they didn't think it was offensive.   Haven't lost much sleep over it though.  On to being positive and supportive :-)

Mary